Eliminating Envy
Confession:
In the past I have seen talent in others as a threat, fearing I had none of my own. Now I see that each person I feared was deserving of celebration.
I can feel my ego going crazy just by admitting this... I can feel him yelling, "NOOOOOOOOO! Don't admit that to anyone!" My inner-self assures me, this is because he fears this truth because it diminishes him. By sharing this real, human quality, that I believe lives in almost every person on earth I think we can work on this toxic way of thinking and behaving.
Many of us see talent in others as a threat to our own skill. When we should be celebrating each other’s talent. Instead, we harbor inner resentment mainly because of our primary fear -that we aren’t good enough.
Our fear blocks us from receiving the gifts other people's talent is there to offer us. My big ego got in the way and cleverly disguised himself as "being competitive". Now it's so clear for me to see how ugly this quality is. It's the person who isn't happy for you when you get the promotion at work, it's the friend who bitterly looks at your vacation photos and you can feel their envy, it's that annoying voice inside us that constantly tries to compare our lives and convince us (in some weird ways) that other people's success means there's less for us. I wasn't an athlete training for a big game being competitive, I was just being envious.
When we finally see it for what it is, our fear and selfishness shrinks. As we diminish the ego within ourselves we can experience the gifts given to and coming from others. We get to celebrate that promotion our coworker got, we get to be happy for our friend who just got back from Tahiti, and because we are able to rejoice in their happiness they are more likely to delight in ours. Be loving and you will receive love. Don't let the ego convince you that you aren't enough. YOU ARE ENOUGH. Don't allow the ego tell you there isn't enough goodness to go around. THERE IS UNLIMITED ABUNDANCE AVAILABLE FOR YOU.
I am ashamed that I unconsciously sent out negativity for so long. I have sent sincere apologies out into the universe and to those people I envied. Coming clean about this truth is my other way of owning up to this and rectifying it. Fortunately, most of the negative energy I sent out was to people I didn't personally know. A lot of us do this, even collectively in conversation among friends when if comes to people we see on tv, big stars or people we want to be like in some way. While that negative energy we send out hopefully has no effect on any of these people, it does have a brutal effect on us. Think of the energy you give as a boomerang, it will always come right back at you.
When you see the envy bubble up within yourself make a shift from fearing that their skill or gift highlights your perceived lack -to- realizing they are sharing their gifts and you have plenty of your own.
Convert any negative thoughts and feelings to celebratory ones- "I'm so happy she's doing so well." "That's awesome he achieved his dream!" "They deserved that award!" Clap for the person when you feel envy and rejoice in happiness and whenever you see greatness.
Don't block the flow of love. Graciously accept and appreciate the gifts others are given, then you will see that there is more space within for your own gifts to emerge.
And finally, ask to be of service to others and allow yourself to be used for good in this world. I know you will do amazing things and I will be rooting for you, celebrating, and clapping as you share your good news in the comments below.